Heart Attack Grill Lives Up To Name

Las Vegas Heart Attack Grill Lives up to its Name

It’s one thing for a restaurant to be cavalier about serving fatty, fried foods and feces-coated meat that has to be served well-done (to burn the bacteria off) without giving a shit about your health, but it’s quite another for an eating establishment to gloat about its menu and the resultant health consequences of eating artery-clogging, cholesterol-laden burgers loaded with saturated fats by calling itself the ‘Heart Attack Grill’. But that’s precisely what one burger chain restaurant had the cojones to do, and for once, a restaurant has lived up to its advertising.

Heart Attack Grill menu

Hahaha, I get it. Heart Attacks are Funny!

On Saturday night, a man suffered a heart attack while dining at the Heart Attack Grill. According to Bridgett, one of the waitresses who works there, the man complained of chest pains shortly after taking a few bites out of his ‘Triple Bypass Burger’ (I’m not making this up — see the Menu)

The restaurant chain, whose gimmick is mocking the millions of (predominantly overweight) Americans who die of heart attacks each year by poking fun at heart disease, has its waitresses dress up as scantily clad ‘nurses’ and calls its owner a ‘doctor’.

So it was no surprise that neither the owner, a “Doctor” Jon Russo or his staff or fellow patrons took the matter seriously.

Basso told Fox News, “One of the nurses came back to me and said, ‘Dr. Jon, we’ve got a patient who’s in trouble.” Basso called 9-1-1 and EMTs arrived shortly thereafter and were able to stabilize and treat the victim, who is alive and enjoying his 15 minutes of fame.

The restaurant, which just opened in October 2011 boasts a menu that includes such items as ‘Flatliner Fries’ and ‘Bypass Burgers’. Using basic math, one can quickly derive that a single meal at Heart Attack Grill can easily exceed 7500 calories. And while one meal there probably won’t be enough to induce a full scale coronary, it’s certainly a step in the right direction. And by ‘right direction’ I mean ‘the grave’.

Heart Attack Grill Waitresses

Like Planet Fitness, which mocks its own members’ efforts to get into shape by offering them free bagels, pizzas, and candy, Heart Attack Grill offers FREE meals to customers who are dangerously obese — that’s right — patrons over 350 lbs eat FREE!

Seriously, Heart Attack Grill owners: If you’re going to facilitate the death process like Dr. Kevorkian, perhaps you could at least offer life insurance as a menu option to go with the deep-fried, beer-battered onion rings?

Keeping in tune with the dark humor and tasteless concept, the victim’s fellow patrons, passersby and customers did nothing to help him — unless by ‘help, you mean whipping out their iPhones and Androids and taking photos and videos of what could easily have been the man’s final breaths.

“Tourists were taking photos of him as if it were some type of stunt,” Basso said, adding that they would never go that far to make the news.

Heart Attack Grill Bypass Burger

Quadruple Bypass Anyone? Bwahahaha!

Sure, Dr. Jon, whatever you say. Keep telling yourself that you sent out Press Releases to the national media to warn diners of the dangers of unhealthy food and not to drum up attention and business for your restaurant. Someone just might believe you.

In case you think this whole thing is just a publicity stunt, here’s an actual video of the man being taken to the ambulance on a gurney.

It should also be noted that 550 lb. Heart Attack Grill spokesman Blair River died last year at the age of 29. Hahaha! Get it! Their spokesman was so fat, he dropped dead! Oh, lordy! I can’t stop laughing. And neither can the Heart Attack Grill. All the way to the bank.

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