So with that said, here is Mexican IFBB Pro Bodybuilder Ed Correa showing that he too is happy to show off his cock for some cash that can pay for a few kits of growth. After snagging the 5th place prize of a whopping $1500 at the Flex Pro show last weekend, it shouldn’t surprise anyone why even top IFBB Pros have to resort to such measures.

So the only question that remains is whether THIS is the reason why a ripped and shredded Correa failed to place better at the Flex Pro? Perhaps if he had a papaya or mango attached to his penis, the judges would be more forgiving. Oh well…

Click Here!

MW:  Laura Jeanne Niedermayer. How the heck are you? Any relation to Scott who used to play for the New Jersey Devils?  Tell us a little about yourself. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LJ.FiT
Gmail: lj.fit24@gmail.com
Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/user/LJFit

Bonus Questions:Bon Jovi or Cinderella: Bon Jovi
Favorite Cheat Food: Taco Bell…oops
Favorite Movie: Gladiator
Favorite Travel Destination: Mexico
NJ Devils or NY Rangers: Philadelphia Flyers!
The New Jersey Devil. Real or Fake: Fake. Except for the time I was driving home from the shore alone, at like 1 am, through the Pine Barrens…then I’d say that shit was real!

It’s one thing for a restaurant to be cavalier about serving fatty, fried foods and feces-coated meat that has to be served well-done (to burn the bacteria off) without giving a shit about your health, but it’s quite another for an eating establishment to gloat about its menu and the resultant health consequences of eating artery-clogging, cholesterol-laden burgers loaded with saturated fats by calling itself the ‘Heart Attack Grill’. But that’s precisely what one burger chain restaurant had the cojones to do, and for once, a restaurant has lived up to its advertising.

Hahaha, I get it. Heart Attacks are Funny!

On Saturday night, a man suffered a heart attack while dining at the Heart Attack Grill. According to Bridgett, one of the waitresses who works there, the man complained of chest pains shortly after taking a few bites out of his ‘Triple Bypass Burger’ (I’m not making this up — see the Menu)

The restaurant chain, whose gimmick is mocking the millions of (predominantly overweight) Americans who die of heart attacks each year by poking fun at heart disease, has its waitresses dress up as scantily clad ‘nurses’ and calls its owner a ‘doctor’.

So it was no surprise that neither the owner, a “Doctor” Jon Russo or his staff or fellow patrons took the matter seriously.

Basso told Fox News, “One of the nurses came back to me and said, ‘Dr. Jon, we’ve got a patient who’s in trouble.” Basso called 9-1-1 and EMTs arrived shortly thereafter and were able to stabilize and treat the victim, who is alive and enjoying his 15 minutes of fame.

The restaurant, which just opened in October 2011 boasts a menu that includes such items as ‘Flatliner Fries’ and ‘Bypass Burgers’. Using basic math, one can quickly derive that a single meal at Heart Attack Grill can easily exceed 7500 calories. And while one meal there probably won’t be enough to induce a full scale coronary, it’s certainly a step in the right direction. And by ‘right direction’ I mean ‘the grave’.

Like Planet Fitness, which mocks its own members’ efforts to get into shape by offering them free bagels, pizzas, and candy, Heart Attack Grill offers FREE meals to customers who are dangerously obese — that’s right — patrons over 350 lbs eat FREE!

Seriously, Heart Attack Grill owners: If you’re going to facilitate the death process like Dr. Kevorkian, perhaps you could at least offer life insurance as a menu option to go with the deep-fried, beer-battered onion rings?

Keeping in tune with the dark humor and tasteless concept, the victim’s fellow patrons, passersby and customers did nothing to help him — unless by ‘help, you mean whipping out their iPhones and Androids and taking photos and videos of what could easily have been the man’s final breaths.

“Tourists were taking photos of him as if it were some type of stunt,” Basso said, adding that they would never go that far to make the news.

Quadruple Bypass Anyone? Bwahahaha!

Sure, Dr. Jon, whatever you say. Keep telling yourself that you sent out Press Releases to the national media to warn diners of the dangers of unhealthy food and not to drum up attention and business for your restaurant. Someone just might believe you.

In case you think this whole thing is just a publicity stunt, here’s an actual video of the man being taken to the ambulance on a gurney.

It should also be noted that 550 lb. Heart Attack Grill spokesman Blair River died last year at the age of 29. Hahaha! Get it! Their spokesman was so fat, he dropped dead! Oh, lordy! I can’t stop laughing. And neither can the Heart Attack Grill. All the way to the bank.

It was the Monday following the Fit Expo and I was excited to get back in the gym after my extended business trip to the East Coast. I was on the phone with Blockhead at around 10am walking towards the front entrance when I saw Jay Cutler himself, surrounded by MPD guy Mark ‘Flex’ Anthony and a third nuthugger.

We all wound up at the front desk together. I swiped my keychain card and was beeped in but Jay and his wolf pack seemed a bit confused about how to navigate their group entrance. Finally Jay just decided to walk past the front desk attendant.

“Excuse me, sir. I need to see your membership card,” bellowed the front desk attendant.

Our four-time, slightly downsized Olympia champ turned a slight shade of red and muttered something about being Mr. Olympia.

“Don’t let this guy in,” I jokingly said. “He’s a troublemaker.”

“I’m sorry sir. I still need you to check in,” she said.

An embarrassed an exasperated Jay pointed up at his poster on the far wall and said to her, “That’s my picture on the wall over there. Isn’t that good enough for you?”

Realizing Jay wasn’t quite famous enough in the bodybuilding universe to merit recognition by the front desk of the Mecca of Bodybuilding, I decided to help Jay out by DHVing him and asking the MPD guy to snap a photo of Jay Cutler and I.

Immediately after Jay was seen in the company of Special Ed, he was granted admission through the pearly gates of Gold’s Venice.

I didn’t even get so much as a ‘Thank You!’

In any event, your welcome, Mr. Cutler. And don’t feel too bad. I’m sure that happens to Michael Jordan and Peyton Manning all the time!

As most fans of MuscleWeek know, Senior Editor Shane Ray caught a bad case of ‘Yellow Fever’ last year and was briefly engaged to not one — but two different Asian fitness models. And while I like to think he’s learned his lesson about dating bikini girls, I’ve also learned that his newest addiction is going to outlast that case of herpes I gave him three years ago (we shared a glass of wine, I swear!) Anyways, when I told him about a hot, new Bikini competitor from Chicago named Maxine Chaikouang, his first question was ‘Chaikouang? What kind of name is that?’ It took exactly zero coaxing to get Shane to sit down for a nice Sushi dinner (on MuscleWeek’s tab) with the razor-sharp and ultra-fine Maxine.

MuscleWeek:  Maxine Chaikouang. Did I say that right? Tell Muscleweek a little about yourself. You own your own personal training company?

Maxine Chaikouang: Yep, I’ve been a personal trainer for over 4 years, but started off on my own in August of 2010. I do most of my business at HiFi personal fitness.

MW: There is a lot of money to be made in Personal Training if one can build a niche and reputation including clientele. What separates a good trainer and “rep counter”?

MC: Besides education. Being able to know exactly what it is that your client wants. If you can provide for them something that someone else is unable to do, and give them the results in regards to their goals; they’ll tend to stay with you for a while. Also, having a six pack and great legs wouldn’t hurt. Just kidding. Kind of.

MW: I am known to train a random client here and there but doing it full time would make me pull the hair I don’t have out of my head. I find it redundant and frustrating. How do you stay motivated and enthusiastic every day with every client?

MC: I know trainers at this popular gym in Barrington, Illinois who can’t train a days worth of clients without being stoned or slipping alcohol in their bottle of Speed Stack. I do have tough days sometimes, but I try to look at each session as an hour with a friend. Most times, it doesn’t feel like work to me. I also take into consideration what my clients pay me for that hour, and it makes me think ” they’re paying this much money just to spend an hour with me “. If you’re a compassionate person, it holds you to a certain feeling of obligation to make it worth their time.

MW: So how did you fall into the whole bodybuilding/physique thing? Was it a natural transition from being a trainer and into the gym scene anyway?

MC: It was pretty natural, and it does not hurt that I practically live at a gym. I was actually inspired by this woman at the gym who was doing shows. I had absolutely no idea that bikini competitions existed, but when she was walking around in her sports bra and tight abs; it truly was motivating. There’s also my mindset that you should always look better than your clients; or most of the general population for that matter. Trainers don’t like to admit it, but I will attest to the fact that if I didn’t have the body that I did; it would have been harder to attract many of the clients I have today.

MW: You compete in Bikini. Why don’t you compete in Figure? What’s the major difference between the two divisions?

MC: I like the general softness that bikini competitors still retain. Plus, I prance around in booty shorts all over the gym; why not showcase my talents on a real stage and actually win something?  The major difference is that figure competitors are much more developed muscularly and their goal is to be even leaner than bikini competitors. Separation between muscles are much more evident.

MW: I understand you work with Dr. Ko. What does he do different than other trainers? He seems to be building an impressive track record. Have you ever worked with anybody else?

MC: You will never meet a more benevolent, yet knowledgeable person with his type of physique. You can sense that he genuinely cares about you and your success. Not to mention his eye for minor details. With his experience, I knew I was in the right hands. I have worked with Katie Peterson, a colleague of mine at HiFI personal fitness. She actually competes in figure competitions.

MW: Would you say contestants in Ms. America, Hawaiian Tropic or Hogs & Honey pageants are athletes? Why do Bikini girls in the NPC consider themselves ATHLETES?

MC: Those girls are not athletes at all. NPC bikini girls are athletes because contrary to belief, it is a hard training regimen. The diet is tough, even though we are restricting calories respectively speaking, we are eating 6x/day and it’s all healthy stuff. No sweets, and definitely NO alcohol which most people find difficult. And most importantly…WE WORK OUT.

MW: What is the long term plan with competition? Pro Card? How will life change if you win the ever so elusive Pro Card?

MC: I most definitely am working to winning a Pro Card this year. I’m not sure what the future will hold when I win my Pro Card, but my purpose of achievement and recognition would definitely be fulfilled. My life probably wouldn’t change much, if anything I would find a new expensive hobby to fill my time.

MW: Do you feel the political card is the key to success in higher levels of competition or do you think hard work always prevail?

MC: Hard work is definitely a must, but in any industry or sport, I believe that politics absolutely plays a role in higher levels of competition. Because when you reach a certain point where there are two girls on stage who look just as equally gorgeous and perfect; how else would you discern but to make a decision that is biased by the pressure from the influential people who just so happen to hold a special interest in one of the girls?

MW: I have spoken to many Bikini competitors who are already dabbling in sorcery, alchemy and pharmacy. Do you feel like using physique enhancing drugs are necessary in serious competitions?

MC: Drugs are bad.

MW: What is the most frustrating things you see or have seen in your short time in this crazy industry?

MC: Girls who try too hard on stage and present themselves as porn actresses. Repulsive… and then going on to see those girls win or place. Just my pet peeve.

MW: Maxine, you’re an Asian girl who competes in Bikini. You’re not a typical boring “Barbie Doll”. How filled is your facebook inbox with schmoes trying to run Game on you? Besides an interview request from MuscleWeek, what kind of funny solicitations do you receive? 

MC: HAHAHAHA. Shane, if only you knew. Most of them your typical “you’re sexy as fuck”, I’m actually still waiting for something original.

MW: Yellow Fever seems to be a very serious but fortunate disease that inflicts many men who cross paths with girls like you. What kind of guys do you go for? You don’t date broke-dick dog bodybuilders who lie and post ducky face phone-mirror pics on facebook all day long do you?

MC: (Cracking up) Seriously? No I don’t go for any Pauly D’s, but what I do find sexy is that all-american, clean cut, highly intelligent, and witty guy (i.e. WASP/ Tom Brady-esque) Anyone who’s unable to hold a decent conversation stands no chance.

MW: If you can change one thing about Bikini what would it be? I see the girls are getting more muscular every show. Should the criteria change? Do you really need striated abs on stage?

MC: The one change I would like to see is a lower frequency of girls who have had their boobs done. I would love to see more NATURAL girls… maybe I’m biased because my bust size or lack thereof leaves me embittered. I think the criteria is fine where it’s at, but any direction further towards muscular would deter me from competing. I don’t think you need striated abs on stage… if anything I think many guys are repulsed by striated abs on girls.

MW: Moving on. Have you shopped any potential sponsors? If you could represent any company in the bodybuilding industry which one would it be?

MC: I have yet to shop for any potential sponsors.. maybe I’ve been waiting for them to come to me? Being a novice I wouldn’t know where to start. One company whose products I’ve always been satisfied with is Optimum Nutrition, but I wouldn’t mind others who are just as reputable.

MW: If you knew you were going to be stuck on a desert island for a full year but could bring with you 3 items. Which 3 items would you bring?

MC: My baby blanket, Atlas Shrugged (it took me a damn near half a year to complete), and my favorite pair of booty shorts.

MW: Who is your bodybuilding industry Hubby? Whose glutes do you want to squeeze?

MC:Is it bad that I don’t have one?

MW: Tell us something about Maxine Chaikouang that not many people know. Tell Muscleweek a secret.

MC: I’m that girl that can bake a batch of cookies, and leave none for anyone. Quite antithetic…

MW: If you could make only one wish come true what would be that wish?

MC: That I could eat all of the cupcakes in the world and still be sexy.

MW: Maxine. What are your 2012 plans? What shows could we see you at this year?

MC: You’ll most definitely see me at Illinois State in May, and I will be ready to rock at Junior Nationals :]

MW: Is there anything you would like to plug? Your website? Your personal training business?  How can potential sponsors, schmoes and clients who want to work with you contact you?

MC: Everyone can check out my site: FitMaxPersonalTraining, or find me on FACEBOOK

Bonus Questions:

Favorite Movie?

Troy.

Favorite Cheat Food?

Cupcakes or Sushi

Favorite Clean Food?

Oatmeal

Favorite Drink?

Tequila on the rocks.

MuscleWeek: Tell us a little about yourself, Rob. Where did you grow up? What do you do for a living?

Rob Krieder: I grew up in southern Maryland. Very rural and country. My grandfather, who was a farmer, gave my parents a few acres to build a house on and that is where they still are living to this day. I get most of my genetics from my grandfather. Hard working man, with huge arms and forearms and a heart of gold.

I have been running a personal training business since 1998, RK BODIES (www.rkbodies.com). I managed health clubs and was a fitness director as well, but I got tired of making the clubs a lot of money, and I myself, only seeing a fraction of that. I’ve always done things my way, and always will.

MW: How did you fall into this cult known as the competitive bodybuilding world? Was sand kicked in your face, too like most of us?

Nope, no sand kicked in my face. I was the stocky kid in school. During lunch, we would always have arm wrestling challenges and me and another kid were the champs.

I picked up a Muscle and Fitness and Flex magazine at a 7-11 when I was about 14 and read those suckers from front to back. I had no idea what they were talking about, but I did my best to apply it all in the basement of my parents house using my fathers sand weights. I kept educating myself through magazines and Arnold’s Encyclopedia of Body Building. I grossly over trained for a couple of years trying to emulate the pro’s routines, not realizing they were all juiced up. It wasn’t until Dorian Yates came on to the scene and his high intensity/low volume approach became popular. The more rest I gave myself, the more I grew.

MW: Would you say you are now over the hump? On your way UP the hump one constantly worries about their nitrogen balance and thinks whey protein will help “build muscle”. Over the hump means if you miss a meal you know you’re not going to shrivel up and drop 60lbs and evaporate into nothing. It means you put your fanny pack away and don’t look down on men with hair on their legs. Which side of the hump are you on?

RK: I was obsessed at an early age, and I am glad I grew out of that quickly. I am educated, with a Bachelors in Exercise Physiology (Cum Laude), so I got over the hump a long time ago. I don’t look down upon anyone. Fanny packs, bad bad memories. How about tight skinz pants back in the day as well. Funny shit.

MW: Did you at one point have a true interest in winning a pro card?

RK: I still do. I hope to obtain that fucker in 2013 at Masters Nationals. I is just a personal goal, one I have had since I was a kid. I have experienced everything a pro body builder has already, except the pro card. I have been sponsored by Twinlab, MHP, MuscleTech and now Big Bitch Formula (www.bigbitchformula.com), I have traveled the country, working booths at show, tons of photo shoots, interviews, videos, magazines cover and features etc etc. I have done it all pretty much. Has it changed me or made me a better man? Not really, but it has made me realize body building isn’t a mean to an end. I will never make a career of body building. I just enjoy doing it. I wouldn’t have competed in over 30 contests in 20 years if I didn’t.

MW: What would have that really given you besides an annual bill to “renew” it?

RK: To pay for your pro card in the first place is the most absurd thing EVER. It may help my business slightly with the added title of IFBB pro body builder. That’s about it.

MW: Do you dabble in seedy ways to make money like majority higher level competitive bodybuilders do? You don’t have a pseudonym somewhere in cyberspace such as Zeus Maximus, do you?

RK: Too fucking funny. I have had so many people contact me for private posing, web cam shit etc. I have morals. I couldn’t live with myself if I did any of that crap. The only person I have a pseudonym for is my fiance. Gotta keep things new and exciting right ? lol

MW: It’s public knowledge now in the bodybuilding world over your distaste and mishap with hiring George Farah. You claim he was not invested in you and was very flaky like a typical bodybuilder despite your handsome payment to him. Tell us a little about that.

RK: We had a run in down in South Beach, Miami this past Nationals. I paid him for 16 weeks of contest prep. I heard from him the first 4 weeks and didn’t hear a peep until our paths crossed in Miami. I asked what happened ? He said what do you mean? I said, I haven’t heard from you in 12 weeks. He tried to turn it around on me, I haven’t heard from you. I said, George I paid you to be my coach, if you don’t hear from me, wouldn’t you feel obligated to at least check in with me ? He said, I lost your email. Someone broke into my garage/car and stole my lap top. I shook my head, knowing you don’t need your lap top to access your address book. I said, you have my number also. He said no I don’t. I showed my phone with his number on it. I said look, I am not hear to argue, can I get a refund, since I feel I paid for a service that I didn’t get ? He said, yeah sure, whatever to make it better. Have I seen any type of refund ?? NOPE. After my radio interview on RX MUSCLE, in which I told the same story, he probably got his panties all up in a bunch.

MW: What possessed you to hire George in the first place? Why George over somebody else such as a Chris Aceto or “Diamond” Dave Palumbo?

RK: I was going to go with Palumbo. The dude is pretty smart. However, a couple good friends of mine suggested Farah, so I did. I thought you get what you pay for ($1500) and Palumbo was much cheaper. Boy was I wrong. I may work with Palumbo for the 2013 Nationals, but to be honest, no one knows my body better than I do. I did consult with someone this past Nationals who was good, but if I had done things my way the final couple of days, I would have done much better.

MW: Is competitive bodybuilding in your future cards still?

RK: Indeed. I love this shit. I don’t give a flying fuck where the judges place me. I won’t kiss anyone’s ass either for a better placing. I do this to challenge myself. It is always a journey I enjoy. It is like therapy I suppose. Until I find another hobby/activity that challenges me in the same way, I will always be a body builder.

MW: What frustrates you the most with the way competitive bodybuilding is governed by the Usual Suspects and power brokers?

RK: Politics man…just politics. During the run in with Farah, he said I had a guy in your weight class place in the top five. I said who? I wont name names, but he said he placed fifth. I knew who it was and threw my arms up in the air and said, well that explains it. That is the only way someone with a fat ass and zero conditioning could make it in the top five.

MW: It seems like Men’s Physique is growing and bodybuilding is dwindling. Just look at the numbers. Why do you think more guys are choosing the Men’s Physique route?

RK: It is more mainstream. It is not as hard core. Body building has gone in the wrong direction the past 15 years. Bigger is not better. It has gone so far to the extreme that I don’t believe it will come back. But its the fans doing. No one wants to see a dude they see on the street every day. They want freaks. It is a freak show, but now the Physique division is great for the women admirers as well as the homosexual population. One thing about the NPC, they are smart business men.

MW: Competitive bodybuilding seems to be a game of alchemy, sorcery and chemical wizardry more than ever. I know of guys still on the local scene barely cracking the Top 5 in a light heavy class that use year around and exceed dosages up to 2g a week and possibly up to 10 unites of serostim daily. Is this facilitated by the way bodybuilding is governed?

RK: Its gone way way overboard. I say, if you don’t have the genetics to be a body builder, pick another hobby. You aren’t gonna make it past the local scene. People who use so much gear just on the local scene, make zero sense to me. This chemistry shit isn’t healthy. People are fucking with their long term health and longevity. I have learned the hard way regarding all of that also. Been there and done that with crazy dosages. I was strong, but bloated me, gave me high blood pressure and nose bleeds etc. Felt horrible all of the time. That ain’t fun to me. For the past several years, I have only touched stuff around contest time. If I cannot grow in the off season from eating lots, training like a beast, resting lots etc, then I am not cut out to be a body builder. Again it goes back to genetics man.

MW: Delusions of Grandeur seems to be an ailment affecting many competitive bodybuilders. In your early years of all of this did you think streets of gold and a lifestyle of a baller was waiting for you eventually?

RK: More people are realizing now that unless you are a Heath or a Cutler there is less than no money or opportunity for you. Like I said above, I have done it all except receive my pro card. It has helped my business etc. I know there isn’t a career in it for me. I learned this years ago. It’s all about balance. Most body builders are extremist for some reason or another. Body building is used to cover up insecurities as well. When something is done at one extreme, the other end of that extreme is waiting right around the corner. Universal balance man.

MW: You seem to be a smooth cat and Playa.  How many Figure girl Industry chick ass have you white washed?  Be honest.

RK: Out of respect and love for my fiance, I will not divulge that information. Let’s just say, I sowed oats here and there, when I was young, dumb and full of………BOOM !

MW: Is dating a competitor chick really all that? The ones I dated were all fit for a straight jacket and Thorazine drip.

RK: Chicks who get into the sport are just as fucked up as a lot of body builders. Covering up insecurities x 100. As for the ones who get on the juice, why the fuck do you want to have facial hair, a raspy deep voice, a manly face, zits, and a huge clit ? Well maybe the huge clit ain’t so bad for em. Easier to get off BOOM !

MW: Where does Rob Kreider see himself in five years?

RK: In 5 years, I will be married with kids, partnered with my boy Bobby Haire with Big Bitch Formula, kicking the supplement industry in the ass, and also opening a gym with him as well.

MW: Who are some of the best people in the bodybuilding industry that you admire and can actually call a friend?

RK: Mat Duvall, Troy Moore, Fred Smalls, Vinnie Galanti, Derek Farnsworth, Lee Priest.

MW: Who shouldn’t be expecting a Christmas card from you this year or anytime soon?

RK: George Farah !

MW: Marry. Fuck. Kill. Ready? Ava Cowan. Jessica Paxton. Erin Stern.

RK: I am engaged man brother. I wouldn’t marry or kill any of them, soooooo…….

MW: How can people get ahold of you for nutritional prep and contest coaching? Is there anything you’d like to plug? Feel free.

RK: My personal/business website is www.rkbodies.com. My sponsor Big Bitch Formula is gonna come on strong in 2012. The BEST tasting whey…ever. NO BS. www.bigbitchformula.com

MW: Name Association. I drop a name and in one word tell us what comes to mind.

George Farah: Fucking douche bag!

Steve Blechman: Wise

Steve Weinberger: The Godfather

Aaron Singerman: I don’t know who he is.

Arnold Schwarzenegger: Bodybuilding.

RK Bodies – Personal Training in Washington, DC, Bodybuilder, Model

One time, I told my girlfriend I was gonna kiss her where it stinks…so I took her to New Jersey. If you’ve driven up 95 on the New Jersey Turnpike, you know what I mean. Smoke stacks, chemical plants, oil refineries, and more Cracker Barrels than any state should legally have. But Jersey isn’t all bad. After all, they gave us Springsteen, this year’s Superbowl Champions (Giant Stadium sits squarely in the marshlands of North Jersey) and the luscious Shelly Albetta, right? Who, you ask? Well, if you haven’t heard of her, you will soon. On an extended lunch break, MuscleWeek Senior Editor Shane Ray caught the Jersey Transit train from Muscleweek’s Manhattan Office to check in with stunning and sexy IFBB Pro Figure babe Shelly Albetta.

Shelly & Twin Sis

MuscleWeek: Hey Shelly, how the heck are you? How often do people call you Shelly Belly? Does that get annoying? Tell us a little about yourself.

Shelly Albetta: I’m actually doing great. Shelly Belly? Wow! Can’t say I’ve heard that one in a while! A little about me. I am 29 years old, and I work full time in sales and as an account manager for my father’s print company.  Slowly working my way up the corporate ladder! I have an identical twin sister (Figure Competitor) Betsy (Albetta) DiGiovanni, who happily married to my brother-in-law, Josh.  The three of us own a 2 family house together — I live downstairs, them upstairs — and it works out great!

MW: You’re from New Jersey. When I think of New Jersey I think of Bon Jovi, Cinderella and the New Jersey Devils. Are you a fan of any of the three?

SB: Ironically, no (laughs). I prefer R&B, not into cartoons of any sort, and hockey doesn’t grasp my attention on any level.  But YES im born and raised Jersey Girl.  You know the saying, “You can take the girl outta Jersey, but you can’t take the Jersey outta the girl”.  I’ll live here for life.

MW: So how did you fall into the whole competitive Figure World?

SA: My Bro in Law was a bodybuilder when him and my sister started dating.  I attended his show and for the first time discovered Figure.  The bodies of those girls grabbed my attention and respect, and from that moment I knew it was something I was going to learn more about until I also was up on that stage.

MW: You’ve been around the competition circuit for a while beginning in 2006. You just recently won your pro card at this past Team Universe. Is that correct?

SA: Well the competition season of 2012 will be my seventh year competing.  I believe Team Universe 2011 was my 17th show, and yes it is where I turned pro.

MW: I know you are now a proud home owner and you have a lot going on but what is your long term competitive plan? Ms. Olympia? Ms. International?

SA:  Honestly, I have never based my success in this sport on my actual rank.  I have always told myself that there are so many beautiful women out there with amazing bodies, focusing on them is a waste of time. All I can control is ME.  So year to year, my goals have always been to improve upon my physique.  To look more balanced, complete, poised, and professional.  Year after year, I believe I have achieved that!  And this year will be no different.  As far as where that will take me…. we will see!

MW:  Let’s get a bit more serious. More girls than you think believe once you win a pro card that there are endless amounts of opportunity and money just waiting for them to take. How true is that?

SA:  Well I haven’t competed as a Pro yet, but I’ve been around the industry long enough to know that its very difficult to make a living off of JUST this sport.  I love competing, and probably always will…. but its secondary to my career in business, which ultimately pays my bills and will secure my future.  As far as other opportunities, I am a firm believer that you have to go after whatever you want in life.  Nothing is going to fall into your lap.  You have to go a go-getter.

MW: You compete in Figure. Your objective is muscular but not overly done. Lean, but not shredded. What’s the difference between Figure and Women’s Physique now? Is it only a matter of posing?

SA: I think as Women’s Physique grows and as we see the Pros compete, the lines between the two will become more clear.  But from what I can currently tell, WP is a leaner dryer slightly tighter look, with poses that demonstrate the female physique differently than that of figure.  Figure to me is all about shape, and creating the illusions of big shoulders, tiny waist, and nice quads while remaining feminine.

Tight!

MW: Some hardcore Figure girls feel a certain amount of resentment towards the Bikini competitors. How do you honestly feel about Bikini and their astronomical numbers on stage these days?

SA: Well bikini has definitely come a LONG way from the first shows it was introduced in.  The competition today is FIERCE and these girls are looking more and more amazing.  I’m not going to knock bikini —  it’s just not for me.   Many of the physiques in bikini are admirable and I commend these ladies for doing their thing… I just prefer those who keep it classy on stage.

MW: How necessary is it for you, Shelly Albetta, to be with a nutritionist? Are you an Oddo Angel or Fitness Factory girl? I’m afraid to ask, but are you a part of the Bombshell Cult?

SA: I’ve been a Fitness Factory girl since Day One.  I know my body pretty darn well after this long.  But it still feels good to be held accountable, and to not have to worry about what to eat come prep time.  So Mike Davies is and always will be my Savior.  He has been with me since my first show, and has help be grown to where I am today.  I will always be thankful for him and Julie.

MW: A stereotype plaguing Figure Girls is that lots of them have deep psychotic issues. It’s been said most serious Figure competitors struggle with Bi Polar Disorder or other mental or physical ailments. What are your thoughts about that?

SA: Well that’s a loaded question (laughs).  I’d have to say just like in life, you come across an array of people with different personalities, histories, backgrounds and issues.   I prefer to stick to those who I know and trust….who do not have any of the issues stated.  I can’t speak for the rest of the figure chicks out there, so I will plead the fifth! (laughs heartily)

MW: I don’t know your status but do you get down with hardcore bodybuilders? Is it natural for a girl so into her body and the stage to want to be with her male counter-part?  What kind of dudes does Shelly Albetta find attractive?

SA: An attractive guy to me is a guy who is confident in himself and know how to treat a woman RIGHT- with respect.  Also he must  take care of himself, mentally and physically.  Most importantly a guy who can handle a strong independent woman.  Good guys are hard to find!

MW: In the upper echelons of competitive Figure how necessary is it for some girls to dabble in alchemy and chemistry to produce a desired result? Can it be done with just smart supplementation and strict training?

SA: I don’t believe anything is necessary.  I believe top girls will come from both sides of the fence…. some will dabble, some will not…. and at the end of the day it will never be the deciding factor in placings.  There are way too many other factors that effect the way a figure girl looks on stage. period.

MW: If you can change one thing about the bodybuilding industry or Figure world what would it be?

SA: Ha just one???  Just kidding — not really! Hmmmm…. one thing? I’d change the recurring theme of many of these girls in the industry…. insecurity.  I’ll leave the answer at that! (Winks)

MW: You support yourself through modeling work and personal training. What else does Shelly Albetta do besides model, work with clients and train? What else are you passionate about?

SA: As stated above, I went to college for Marketing, and I have been in business for six years.  That is how I support myself.  Anything extra I do in this industry (training. modeling, etc.) is all extra!

MW: Okay. Funny stuff. If you were going to be trapped on a deserted island for a year what 3 things would you take with you?

SA: 1. My IPOD (how could I survive without DRAKE?); 2. Chapstick; 3. My fave blanket (comes with me everywhere)

MW: Who is your Hollywood Husband?

SA: It’s a tie between Mark Wahlberg and Ryan Gosling.

MW: Okay, don’t think too much about this one: F-Marry-Kill:  Jay Cutler.  Arnold Schwarzenegger.  Kai Green.  Go!

SA: WOW YIKES! Murder Arnold, cuz he’d come back anyway…. he’s The Terminator!  Marry Jay- 2 blondes look good together (laughs). Sleep with Kai??  I guess that was by default?? (Cracking up)

MW: Let’s talk about Facebook Schmoes — Annoying as hell or do you love all of your fans?

SA: I’ve weeded them out over the years… got some creepy dudes out there (laughs) but all in all I’m a classy chick and try to remain nice until someone crosses the line!  But I got nothing but love for anyone that supports me! (Winks)

MW: If you could recommend ONE supplement for the aspiring Figure competitor what would it be?

SA: Protein Powder.

MW: Is there anything you’d like to plug or represent? How does one get in contact with Shelly Albetta for modeling work, sponsorship and everything else in between?

SA: Well for now my FaceBook page is the best way to contact me. I  haven’t gotten to making a website just yet…. I might have to contact Vendetta Marketing about that, but we will see what 2012 brings!

MW: Word Association:  I drop the name and you think of the first few words that come to mind.

SA: Okay, let’s do this!

JM Manion?

Head Honcho

Aaron Singerman?

A character!

Erin Stern?

Balanced.

Monica Brant?

Epic!

Shannon Dey?

Guru.

Governor Chris Christie?

Ughh! I hate politics.

MW: Thanks for sitting down with MuscleWeek, Shelly. We wish you the best of luck in 2012!

SA: Thank you, Shane! Congrats on all of the success with MuscleWeek!

__________________________

For sponsorship or professional opportunities, Shelly can be contacted via her Facebook page.

MuscleWeek exposed the unlikelihood of this actually happening by pointing out that even the most famous and well-known fitness model, Monica Brant can’t command that much of a salary. In fact, most fitness models and are barely compensated at all for endorsing supplements and representing these companies at Expos and stores, with the models receiving a tiny stipend or free supplements in exchange for their services.

MuscleWeek called BULLSHIT on Anna’s story right from the start — beginning with the whole $75,000 contract story — and ending with our own analysis of Anna’s physique, which we concluded was the result of, ahem, supplemental testosterone. But what about the middle part of the story — that this phantom supplement company offered her $75,000 but only if she agreed to take a non-steroid product called Anavar.

For the uninitiated, Anavar was a trademarked name for an actual steroid (oxandrolone) made by Searle (now Pfizer) Pharmaceuticals during the 1980′s and 1990′s and sold via a prescription. Anavar — the steroid — is no longer produced legally. But interestingly, in 2003 a man named Jared Wheat registered the abandoned trademark and his company (coincidentally, based out of Georgia) Hi-Tech Pharmaceuticals began selling a product called Anavar. Now, MuscleWeek cannot say whether that product contained the substance oxandrolone or Hi-Tech was simply misrepresenting a placebo as Anavar, but Jared Wheat, the CEO of Hi-Tech was sentenced to 50 months in prison for selling generic knockoffs of legitimate products using an off-shore manufacturing plant.

But just to leave no stone unturned, MuscleWeek contacted Hi-Tech Pharmaceuticals — the only company of whom we are aware is selling a non-steroidal product called Anavar — and asked them if they knew of Anna Watson and whether they were the company who offered Anavar and the $75,000 contract to her. Here is their reply:

And so, the plot thickens. Here is a nervous and jittery Anna Watson responding to our article on Inside Edition yesterday:

Watch carefully as she seems to grow nervous admitting even to using whey protein — feeling the unnecessary need to explain that it’s found in milk. Between the proselytizing and the fumbling, our BS Detector is going off the charts.

There’s going to be a break in this story soon. Because, as we always say at MuscleWeek: Behind every woman with large muscles is a boyfriend holding an empty syringe.

Move over Firehouse, there’s a new Sheriff in town. One with a better location. And better food.

At Muscleweek, we all know how important it is to prevent catabolism at all times. And at Gold’s Gym in Venice, that sentiment is on display every morning as I see cars circling around and around the front parking lot, passing up an abundance of available spaces a mere 200 feet away in the rear parking lots, solely to prevent the devastating loss of muscle tissue that is sure to accompany those extra 400 steps. Not only could those steps break down an athlete’s hard-earned muscle, but the mere thought of having to walk a few extra yards is enough to induce a cortisol release that could stunt growth for up to eleven years!

No way. At Gold’s Gym, we circle until we get our spot. And if we can avoid walking back to the car, driving the one block to the Firehouse, circling for parking and walking from the Firehouse lot into the restaurant itself, then the muscle we save could very well make us an Olympia contender by month’s end.

All of which brings me to Muscle Monster Meals — a brand new restaurant on wheels that is currently occupying valuable Google street real estate in front of Gold’s Gym in Venice. Owned and operated by Leilani Madrid, a stunningly beautiful woman of Hawaiian descent, Muscle Monster Meals offers fare ranging from steak to pork to chicken, with a slightly islander twist together with bodybuilding staples like broccoli, yams, and brown rice. Leilani, a member of the gym, came up with the concept two years ago and then spent the next twenty months caught up in the bureaucratic log jam also known as the Los Angeles County Permit System.

With the paperwork finally complete, Leilani and Muscle Monster Meals opened shop on Gold’s Venice’s doorstep last Monday and the rest, as they say, is bodybuilding history. For my fellow Gold’s trainees teetering on the brink of catabolism following a cardio session consisting of two miles on the treadmill at precisely 3.2 MPH, do not despair. Salvation lies inside the green monster of muscle meals.

Despite my cold and congestion, I sampled the steak and brown rice, and if the stray dog’s incessant whining and begging was any indication, the food is fresh, aromatic, and delicious (okay, I gave him half my bowl).

Bob Bowl, consider this your 30 Notice to Vacate.

Yesterday’s feature on University of Georgia cheerleader Anna Watson focused primarily on how easily the mainstream media routinely gives a pass to athletes on the steroid issue — even when the visual evidence is overwhelming.

Take for example, Mark McGwire. The dude went from a slim, freckle-faced boyish slugger to a jacked, Popeye-armed, acne-coated behemoth, and yet no one dared to question (or even bring up) the issue of steroids in the face of Mark’s tell-tale visual markers. No, a stray bottle of a legal supplement ‘accidentally’ left in public view in his locker was all the excuse anyone needed to overlook the obvious.

Or take Marion Jones, the muscular, Gold-medal winning, uber-athlete track star. She was married to and coached by a known steroid user, exhibited many of the physical traits (squared up jawline, enhanced muscularity, and extremely low bodyfat) of a steroid user, and most importantly, was running faster than any woman in the history of the world. And yet, not a single member of the mainstream media had the balls to mention what was so obvious in bodybuilding circles: The gal was juiced.

So while I’m not entirely surprised by the media’s reaction, I AM somewhat surprised by some of the public comments rolling in. After all, the media has an obligation to fact-check and must be wary of speculating on a negative sports angle too much, so as to avoid losing press passes, access to players or locker room privileges. But what’s the public’s excuse for being so stupid and naive? How is it that after having nearly EVERY single top baseball player of the 90′s (Bonds, McGwire, Canseco, Sosa, Rodriguez, Bagwell, Palmeiro, Clemens) admit to or get caught juicing, after the world’s fastest men (Ben Johnson, Carl Lewis, Tim Montgomery, Dwaine Chambers, Justin Gatlin, Kelli White) get caught juicing, after the best defensive player in the NFL(Merriweather) gets caught juicing, after the top cyclists admit to doping, after every muscular UFC fighter gets caught using steroids, there somehow remains MILLIONS of morons who refuse to accept that STEROIDS ARE EVERYWHERE. Has no one read the Mitchell Report? If not, here’s a link to the actual Mitchell Report. Or read the names of the 52 NFL Pro Bowlers popped for illegal substances here.

Common Sense > Drug Test

Do I have Anna Watson’s bloodwork to prove she’s a juicer? Of course not. Nor did I possess the blood results of UFC Female Fighter Christiana ‘Cyborg’ Santos when I referred to her obvious steroid use. But one positive drug test later, I was vindicated. This is a blog — not a court of law. We don’t need to PROVE Anna Watson is on steroids beyond a reasonable doubt. If that was the standard for reporting, no one would ever break ANY story. But when a fitness expert such as myself sees a young woman with certain physical traits that I have personally observed hundreds of times in my lifetime as being associated with the use of anabolic steroids, I’m going to call it as I see it.

Don’t believe me? I went ahead and questioned some of the world’s most esteemed and elite personal trainers at the Mecca of Bodybuilding — Gold’s Gym in Venice — by showing them a single photo of Anna flexing her biceps. Here are their responses:

IFBB Pro Bodybuilder and 4-time Ironman Winner turned Celebrity Personal Trainer Chris Cormier: (Laughs) “C’mon man. Of course she’s juiced. Look at her face.”

Former IFBB Pro Bodybuilder and Trainer to the Stars like 50 Cent, Charles Glass: “She’s not natural. You can tell by her face. She’s definitely using a little something extra.”

Elite Personal Trainer Rico McClinton: (Laughs) “Why would she even say that (she’s natural)? Of course she’s not.”

Elite Personal Trainer Sean K: “C’mon! Do you even need to ask? I’ve been training women for 20 years and they cannot build that level of muscle naturally.”

There is only one reason why people continue to believe that hyper muscularity can be achieved without the use of steroids: GULLIBILITY.

But take it from Muscleweek or the Experts: You, the general public, are being PUNKED!

Just because an athlete claims he or she is steroid-free doesn’t make it true. Athletes lie. Bodybuilders lie. Juicers lie.

Having oodles of muscles and claiming to be steroid-free is the inside joke of bodybuilders everywhere. And if you believe it, then the joke, my friend, is on YOU.